The Girl Behind the Curtain: What Hiding Taught Me About Being Seen

I've been working on the theme of hiding for the last few months and oh wow, there's so much packed into this topic.

First came the experiences, where being in the spotlight was utterly uncomfortable.

I started playing the violin when I was 5 years old. By the time I was 6, I had won a national competition, playing a Year 3 programme.

When I was 7, I was performing with a group of students in their final year, in front of an audience of 300 people. I was so small compared to the rest of the group that they put me right at the front for the audience to see me. All went well, until the curtains closed… behind me. They were thick velvet curtains that went all the way to the end of the stage, and I frantically tried to break through them, much to the audience's amusement.

My next memorable visibility fiasco was in Year 10, when my class was competing with Year 11. Unusually, the performance was being videotaped, something the Year 11 boys had paid for as a present to the girls in their class. At the moment when my class captain and the Year 11 captain had to compete, my classmate got cold feet. She refused to go on stage, and I was sent out instead. I was utterly unprepared and failed miserably. On camera.

Then came school graduation in Year 11. I was sitting with my classmates, listening to the teachers' pompous speeches, when - without any warning - my school director thrust a microphone into my hand and demanded a speech. I froze. Someone dropped something nearby, so I faffed about trying to help them, frantically thinking of something deep and meaningful to say. I'm sure whatever came out of my mouth that day was pretty mediocre.

I could keep going, but you get the picture. My relationship with visibility was somewhat complicated.

And yet, here I am.

Visible.

It took time, inner work, and a lot of unlearning, but I found my way out from behind the curtain.

That journey is exactly why I do the work I do today.

If this resonates because you've spent years making yourself smaller, stepping back, or waiting until you felt "ready enough", I want you to know this: Your story isn't a flaw. It's your greatest qualification.

My Practitioner Training is for people who've done their own inner work and feel called to guide others through theirs. If you're ready to turn everything you've lived through into something that genuinely helps people heal, I'd love for you to take join the waitlist here: welcome.gularavincent.co.uk/intergenerational-trauma-healing-method-2026